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Self-Care for Extremely Busy Women

Jul 10, 2018

In this episode, I share some personal stories and some insights about telling the truth in my life and what that did for me. In the opening essay, I talk about a class I taught some years back about personal essay writing – and what it taught me about sharing the truth you keep avoiding.

I talk about how hard it is for sensitive people to open up and share what they’re thinking – even in this age of letting it all hang out. And I make a pitch for everyone to step up and speak their truth, even if they fear opposition.

For that truth is where the ‘gold’ is in life – contained in the things we hold back from or would rather not discuss. I’ve found such truth telling to be powerful medicine for getting back into the flow of life, and for moving on to our next level of evolution and discernment.

In the main body of the podcast, I share about my experience of coming out as a lesbian at age 52 – a powerful truth I’d managed to avoid for 32 years. Then I offer up all kinds of ways you can excavate your own truths, and reckon with the shadowy stuff you’ve been avoiding … so you, too, can enjoy the gold that is there for you.

Here are notes I referred to in the podcast, if you’d like a sequence of steps to follow to find your own truth.

As ever, I welcome your comments. You can post thoughts here, or find me on Twitter or email me at


  1. Notice where you feel pressure in your life
    1. What wants attention?
    2. Could be health, relationship, financial, parenting, community, where you live, an issue at work, family matters
      1. Could be hidden addictions
      2. A lie that’s festering
  • Something you didn’t even realize you’re hiding from
  1. Once you start to look, just go with it
    1. Let all of it reveal itself
  2. We are powerful at hiding from our truths
  1. Ask yourself what truth you’re avoiding?
    1. Look in places where you feel resentment, confusion, dread, annoyance, fear, anxiety, stuckness, ‘I’d rather think of anything else’
  2. Know that your busy-ness may be a smokescreen for what is out of alignment in your life
    1. If you have too much going on you can’t feel what’s out of whack
  3. Journal on it
    1. Let the words just flow through your pen
    2. Let it reveal itself
    3. Prepare to be surprised
  4. Meditate and let thoughts find you
    1. During meditation or later
    2. Seek a new level of inner calm where you can hear yourself more deeply
    3. Taking solitary walks can help
  1. As you’re going to sleep ask for a dream about it
    1. Clarity
    2. Write out a description of the dream, then sit for a minute and see if an interpretation comes to you (2 minutes)
  1. Talking it out with a trusted friend or even therapist
    1. Find someone to talk to about what’s bothering you
    3. Nothing is too big or too small


  1. Allow it to be … do not resist it
  2. Don’t try to solve it today or tomorrow
  3. Understand it is a gift
    1. And it will set you free
  4. Let that truth show YOU the way to handle it
    1. The solution lives in your body and will inform you when you’re ready to hear it
  5. Know you’re not alone and others have walked this before you
  6. Ask for support and help where appropriate
    1. Professional
    2. Friends
    3. Groups
      1. 12 step groups
      2. Hospital groups
  • Church groups
  1. Hospice groups
  2. Meet ups
  3. Group therapy
  1. Only act on your truth when you know it’s the right time
    1. You have all the time in the world to resolve whatever it is
    2. IT will inform you when the time is right
  2. Above all know your truth is here to teach you something
    1. That this truth is a benevolent guide
    2. And that it’s here for you to discover because you are, indeed, ready
  3. This is the gold in life because this is where the riches are
    1. Enjoy